Friday, September 9, 2011

stretch marks and squishy tummies

Hey everyone. Well, I'm gonna get a little bit real with y'all in today's post.

It's been a long week, adjusting to my new schedule with the kiddos in school now. I am walking Ruth to and from preschool each day, so I'm spending more time outside pushing the double stroller around. It's been nice to get some fresh air every day and also some exercise. But, it has also forced me to be in a stricter routine, too. I've got Robby on a pretty tight napping schedule now, and I am trying to also make more defined hours for shopwork, housework, and time playing with the children. And I'm gonna be honest - I'm exhausted!

When Clint got home last night, he saw the look on my face. You know, that look that says, "I need ME-time! Please!!" So, he graciously offered to watch the kiddos for a little bit so I could go out. On my way out to the car, I ran into a neighbor that I haven't seen in months. We chatted for a little bit, and then she asked me, "Are you pregnant?" (I'm hoping that she didn't ask me that because I look pregnant. Maybe she asked me because I kind of have a history of always being pregnant or having a little one on my hip! :)) Anyway, I laughed it off, but as I drove away to the mall, the tears started flowing. Cause all I could think was, "I look pregnant. I'm fat. I'm never gonna have my pre-baby body back." - I told you this post was gonna be real! haha...

So, after this pity party in my head, I immediately went into the mall food court and had McDonalds for dinner! Cause, of course, that's the logical choice for dinner when you're trying to lose weight... I'm an emotional eater, what can I tell you?

After I ate, I walked down to JCPenney and looked for an outfit that didn't make me look pregnant. But, honestly, it seems like the only tops that look good on me right now are the loose, tunic type tops that cover up my squishy tummy. Well, God was kind to me in that JCPenney dressing room. I found two fun tops and two pairs of pants that fit really well. And, as I walked out of the store with the bag in my hand, I confess I did feel a little bit better. (And I have to add this part, too: My dad got me my JCPenney credit card a few years ago. He pays the bill each month. He got it for me so I could go every now and then to buy myself something nice. Isn't that the sweetest thing?  I love that man.)

So, here's a photo of me this morning wearing one of the outfits I bought:





As I was going through all these emotions yesterday, I tried to talk to the Lord about what I was feeling. And ever faithful God that He is, He spoke to me.  He said so gently, "Lora, you are not what you weigh."  And the more that I thought about how discontent I've been with my weight and post-babies body, I know that I should be proud of my stretch marks and squishy tummy. Because those are the evidence of the five amazing children that I have been blessed to carry and birth.


So, I walked out of the mall carrying my bag of loose fitting tunics and size 14 jeans, feeling better and a little more accepting of my body. But before I walked out, I stopped by McDonalds on the way and got a hot fudge sundae to go. (I couldn't resist! haha...)

The weight will come off, little by little. And one day, I will be skinny again.


But God is so right - size 14 or size 7,
I am definitely not what I weigh.


15 comments:

  1. Oh Lora... I cried for you this morning when I saw your pictures. Not because I feel bad for you, or pity you, but because you look absolutely beautiful! My tears were from God, wanting you to know that you are indeed beautiful! I wish I could be there to look you in the eyes and tell you this! Because you are! And he's right, you are not what you weigh!
    xoxo

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  2. good for you! women's clothing sizes today are way smaller than they used to be. looking at your pics, i'm about the same size. size 14 is what a size 10 was in the 60s. you look amazing, you look happy... keep doing what you're doing.

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  3. What a great message that I think every woman who has had children can learn. Even though my "baby" is almost 6 I still struggle with the baby fat that my four beautiful children have blessed me with :)

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  4. Thanks for writing this and being so real! It's exactly what I needed this morning :)

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  5. Great post, Lora! Keep being real. I love reading your blog posts! Very encouraging.

    p.s. cute top! JC Penney, huh? Got to check it out!

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  6. I only have 2 kids, but understand how you feel about your post babies body. (I'm struggling more this time because I'm not loosing the weight as quickly and it looks much squishier than with my first.) It's hard in a society that puts so much value in appearance, but we are not what we weigh! And honestly, I think you look great in your photos. You are beautiful and your inner beauty shines through, too.

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  7. beautiful, lora! sending you hugs!!
    i have had more than a few "are you pregnant" questions. especially painful since i canNOT get pregnant. i have a squishy tummy, and a double scar across it from two ectopic pregnancy surgeries and little dot scars from a hysterectomy.
    i struggle, too. the lord has whispered the same thing in my heart, i am not what i weigh. and while i don't have children from my scars and squishyness, i do have a reminder of god's grace and goodness! and i think of jesus, and his scars. he has them because of me-his love for me. surely i can be contented with my own!!

    love you and so thankful for this post! xo

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  8. You are beautiful, Lora. Thank you, friend, for this post.

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  9. you are so right!
    although at the size I am (22) I sure wish I was a 14 now LOL. that was me 'skinny' LOL.
    It's been a struggle for me my whole life.
    I have 4 kids and even gained weight with the 5th kid~a miscarriage!
    I struggle with my thyroid.
    I am an emotional eater, definitely.
    Your dad sounds amazing~my parents are not like that, at all!
    long story~another time.
    hugs to you!

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  10. Anonymous6:07 PM

    Lovely Lora...

    Can I get a little real with you? Your friend that helped you with the booth at the Bloom conference chit-chatted with me while she was waiting for your both of your meals in the dining area. She was so excited to be at the conference and also so excited to be able to fellowship with you. From the words that she spoke from her heart, I knew that she valued you greatly. In this little conversation with her, she talked about your jewelry and how the Lord inspires your creations through prayer and worship, which I thought was AWESOME and so did she. She also mentioned how hard you work while raising your five kids and how your attitude just shines His light and beauty all over the place. Needless to say, I already felt blessed to have the opportunity to stop by your booth later and say hi. Can I just say that as I approached your booth and realized that *you* were the one that your friend was talking about, one of my first thoughts was how pretty and amazing you looked, and that I couldn't believe you even had one kid! You were radiating, girlfriend! And the Lord must be so close to your heart because you look very very young... your complexion and skin are so full of life! I know this may seem like trivial surface level stuff, but it's things that we as women care about, and so I don't think it's altogether trivial. Point is, your beauty is far more than skin deep, and it DEFINITELY permeates off of you... but you also are very lovely, beautiful and look amazing, in my opinion, from one sista to another.

    Blessings to you! Hope to see you at the conference next week... woohooo!!!

    : )

    hugs,
    kitsy

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  11. You really are beautiful! Thank you for sharing with us! It's hard to remember that our worth is not measured in our size...I mean, read Proverbs 31, you don't hear a single thing about what the woman's size is...it's all about who she is. Hats off to you, Mommy!

    Have you heard the Mom song? It makes me laugh...but it's too true..here's a link.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wkc9-SvqfDM

    God bless!

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  12. Thank you so much for your honesty and sincerity in this post. As women, we all struggle to believe we are more than our weight and I think its women like you, who are bold enough to really share from the heart, are what will bring about change. The Lord is using this post to break the enemy's lies over beautiful women's lives and that is pretty darn awesome!!!

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  13. Lora - Thanks for this post. I want to remind you that just a few months ago you were wearing size 18 maternity clothes. Now you're in a 14. You are doing your part. It took several years to get where you are, and it won't come off immediately. However, delight yourself in the Lord and HE WILL give you the desires of your heart. Keep looking up!!!

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  14. NatalieY.4:09 PM

    You are so beautiful, friend! I love this post... I knew I would have to read it again, alone... at home. I just did. It blessed me more than you know!!! Thank you for being real, and being a real friend!!! Xoxo

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  15. Oh Lora, your inner beauty radiates! I am so blessed to know you. Your heavenly Father is so pleased with you and created you in his image, and you are beautiful in His sight.

    I just realized that our bedroom is a similar color as your bathroom. I love it :)

    Your transparency is a breath of fresh air in this image obsessed world. I will continue to pray for you, friend!

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